I've been doing tarot for many years (I skeptically called it a "parlor game".) I have my own interpretations for the cards...not too many books when I started. Anywho, how do you handle negative readings? In that case, how do you handle negative stuff when someone asks "How do you feel about such and such?"

I am a cranky old woman, and I don't mince words, so at times I am brutally honest. I try to soften the blow, but I end up just being short and too the point. Also, when doing a "reading", usually towards the end of the reading, I have found that I just spout something out like, "Stop hurting this person" or "No, it's not a good idea" or "Why in the he** are you buying your son a car?" I don't even know, or care, that this person has a son. When asked to elaborate, I can't.

I have tried in the beginning to "lie" about things, but this is much more difficult than being blunt and honest. Also, after I lie about the "reading" I always feel weird...dirty..like I need to shower is the only word for it.

I also USED to tell people that Tarot readings are a crock and it's just a game, and you can take it or leave it, but this never felt right either.


PS. I don't read for money. If I could always guarantee good news, then sure why not take money, but then sometimes the news is not so good. If I took money then, I would feel like I kicked the dog...twice.

I know exactly what you mean about sometimes having 'psychic Tourette's syndrome.' Sometimes when I am 'tuning in' to a person, I get an impression and it just gets verbalized before I have a chance to think about it. With practice, I've managed to bring it under much better control, but occasionally something sneaks out. Also, any time I try and 'sugarcoat' something a little too much or flat out lie and say something will be okay even when I know it won't I feel the same way you do. Like I need a spiritual shower. My advise: Tell the truth. Sometimes it hurts. If you do sense something that is negative, try and give them some insight as to why and what can be learned from the situation. That usually works quite well for me. Whenever someone asks my opinion, the first thing I do is try to sense whether or not they really want it or if they are just looking for me to tell them what they want to hear. If they really want my opinion, I give it to them. If not, I respectfully decline. One thing to consider: I will probably have a few people disagree with me but it has been my experience that for some reason people do not really take psychic guidance seriously unless they are paying for it. Since you (like me) are reading to help people and not as a living, they might not take your answers as seriously. That's their problem. Stay cranky and do your best to be honest to yourself and the people you read for!:DJust remember that we are all here to help each other.

Thank-you so much for your reply. It made me feel so much better, again like I am not alone.

Most readings are positive, thank goodness. When I do hit on a negative, I always TRY search for some type of silver lining.

I do tell people that this is just what I see, and their destiny is not written in stone.

Negative readings take more time, and usually end up a little on the philosophical side. It's like holding a mirror up to someone and saying yes, your nose is crooked, and then explaining, but the whole face (including the nose) is beautiful.

For example: A woman asks, "is my husband cheating on me?" Well, yes, BUT, you have to learn forgiveness and move on. BUT, I've wasted my life on him. No, you haven't, you will learn the ultimate love which is forgiveness. BUT, how can he do this to me? This isn't about him, he has to learn his own lessons, it is about rising above the crud and learning your own lesson which is forgiveness.

I have had some "tarot readers" talk about the ethics of "telling the truth" and maybe twisting the question into something more mundane, or putting limits on what types of questions people ask. But I feel as though this is not why the come to us. They want an answer to a specific question whether it be good or bad.

Way back when, In Palo Alto, I went and PAID a tarot reader to read me. It was a fluke and something to do. She told me I would die before I turned 35. GASP! Needless to say I ran out crying. I know alot of you are saying that she was a "bad reader...she broke rule one, or, well you're still kicking..see, tarot readers are full of hooey" No, she wasn't. I was living a very fast lifestyle at the time, and if I didn't change my course, I probably would be dead. Even though I thought she was full of hooey at the time, it did make me pause and think and change a few things in my life. So, if she was here today, I'd give her a big hug and thank her.

Amen. I am a firm believer that honesty is the best policy. It definitely sounds like you have a handle on how to approach your readings. And if you need any moral support, the people on this board are great at that!

I believe that honesty is the best policy. But if you can be compassionate about it please do.

And as both you and Snoopy said, you don't feel right and feel dirty if you don't tell them the truth and lie. That's the big indicator on what you should do. The ole 'be true to yourself' maxim.

Your right Snoopy, we live in a society mostly based upon trading cash for goods and services. If we don't pay for it then we rationalize that it must not be worth anything. We're not all like this but we are all taught to be that way.

Most people don't want a reading with bad news. So if it is chances are they won't take it well no matter what. I haven't done Tarot very much but I did have to relay information about accidents, surgeries and illnesses. I just tried to be sensitive and compassionate as I could while still giving them the truth.

I also want to say thanks for following your path. It's tough being psychic and a Tarot reader even in today's society. You are a brave soul. =)

Nakis, you are right. We must be true to ourselves, and if a person can't give an honest answer about negative things, then how can any reading by that person have merit?

When I was just learning the Tarot, I had a very negative reading that indicated a death of someone close to the person I was doing the reading for... which I tried to make light of at the time. I was very new at it. Well, not more than 2 weeks later, a person who sat next to him in our office died very unexpectedly! This really blew me away, and I was astounded by this actually happening. The man who died was also a friend of mine, so it hit me pretty hard. But, I have never taken reading Tarot lightly since that time. I will give the negative information in the kindest way I know how.... because I have seen the impact that such a reading may have. I had many people coming to me and asking how I could ever predict such a thing, almost as if I 'caused' the death. But, this was a lesson to me to always read with compassion. I have never forgotten it.

I had a woman come to me last September because her husband left her. I said "He'll come back before the years over." I've never seen someone so happy. I didn't feel good about it. I didn't feel as though I did her a big favor. Well, he did come back that November.

She came over for a second reading last May, once again about her husband. I told her that he will leave her again in December. She got real mad at me and left.

I should have said, "He's going to THINK about leaving in December. Remember, that Destiny is not set. Sometimes just knowing that you are going down a bad path will change the outcome."

Why did'nt I say "THINK" well, cause he's gonna bolt no matter what she does. I "THINK" she has a few months to get prepared...

As for the "pay" issue? I shouldn't really say that I have not been paid. I have flowers, nick-naks, pies, cakes, cookies, cards, rocks, candy, jewelry etc... that people have brought or sent me. I have accepted these because they were given as gifts, and not expected. Never money, even as a gift.