Just wanted to let you all know that I have revisited this site many times to read your posts in response to the loss of my mother. Strangely enough -I get the most comfort from the love and support you have all selflessly shared with me. I cry as I read each of your posts, partly for your own loss of loved ones that you've openly shared and mostly because of your genuine heartfelt support. I can't tell you all enough how special each of every one of your messages are to me. I have learnt to take each day in stride and have grappled with my faith, my denial, my anger. But mostly I struggle with the pain and loneliness. Sadly I have not yet received any signs from my Mom- but I understand with your help that my own pain may be too intense for her to reach me just now and I remain optimistic. I just want to thank each one of you guys for your wonderful posts and let each of you know that in some way each of you have helped ease my burden. Your all warm and gentle spirits.

eyeseeall, I haven't been around for quite some time and just now saw your original post. I'm so sorry for the sudden loss of your mother. You have my deepest sympathy and I will be thinking of you. I hope you do recieve a sign from your mother soon but remember that it happens when it's the right time and it may be something so small that if you look too hard you could miss it. When your grief turns the corner that's when you might see it. My husband and I lost our beloved dog Molly last August. I have since seen her in vivid dreams several times but the one occassion I want to tell you about happened 4 months after her death. It was Dec. 6 and I had been to Target,shopping, and as I pulled into my parking space for my apt. I noticed a piece of paper on the floor in front of the passenger seat, I thought it was weird because I never leave trash in my car and it wasn't there when I drove to the store. So I picked it up to throw it away and I was absolutely shocked when I saw what it was! It was a Target reciept dated Aug. 7, the day Molly died! After we came home from the vet that morning I had to bag up Molly's very soiled bedding and leave it on the porch until it could be cleaned- I went to Target that day to buy the bags so I could do that. I had no idea how the reciept got in my car because the checkers always hand it to you with your change and it invariably gets shoved in my wallet and purse. That night that I found that reciept it had been exactly 4 months since she died. As soon as I saw it I knew that it was a "hello" from her, in fact I put it up on the fridge and it's still there. So keep your hope and your faith because one day you might see something so small and insignificant that you wouldn't ordinarily bother with it but for some reason you'll look closer and you'll know that it's your "hello" from your mother.

There are a lot of wonderful hearts on this board.
It's wonderful, that in your grief, you can still recognize that. It speaks of good emotional health and healing.
I hope things continue to get better and that someday you do get that sign from your mother.

Eyeseeall, I am confidant you will hear from your mother. It may take a while, but it will happen. I have just started having a few dreams about my mother that I am sure are a visitation. Just yesterday, I had overslept, and had the distinct impression of my mother laying beside me, holding my hand and talking to me gently. It was such a pleasant little visit and put me in a great mood for the rest of the day.
You will always miss her, I don't think that part ever goes away. Renee's story points out something very important -- keep your eyes and mind open to little things that might otherwise escape your attention. Good luck dear! It will happen, just give it time.

Eyeseeall ~

I'm so glad that you popped in to say hello. I'm new too, and the people here are really wonderful. I can totally understand your lonelyness. Rest assured your mom will 'show up' when you least expect it. My mom passed away before I got pregnant with our son. When I went in for the ultrasound, I didn't want to look at the screen because I had had a m/c before and was afraid to get bad news again. When the technition asked me "don't you want to look at your baby?" I looked hesitently at the screen, and at that moment it felt like my mom was standing Right Next to me. Then I saw my baby's heartbeat and I knew my mom had seen it too. Thats why even though my mom had passed, I still feel like she knows our son. I know it's hard to believe it at this time, but things Will get better. My mom passed in the fall, and I still remember the spring day when I felt like my life started over. I was listening to my "Return to Me" soundtrack CD and the Dean Martin song "Good Morning Life" song came on. I truly felt wonderful for the first time in months. It will get better for you. Take care, Madammacabre

I'[m glad we all helped in some small way. It's hard for me, at least, to be here and not where you are to give you a true and real hug. I'm glad things are looking up for you again and that you're finding some inner peace. =)