I'm hoping that someone can help me in understanding something.

All my life I have had this progressive vision of my life. I have been and still can see this vision that has been constantly unfolding throughout the decades of my life of my life. I have been able to see the events of my life before they happen. Not pictures mind you but in ways of knowing that defies language and pictures. I just knew certain things will be and when they will happen. Not all things just the major flows, changes and crisis.

My question to anyone who may be able to lend me some insight or help is in two parts. For most of my life I have been seeing one thing and in the past several years I have been seing this other thing.

At the age 37, something changed. It's been like a huge sign, completely unmistakeable that in my 38th year of life something changed. But I have no idea what it is. It's like scientist seeing the affects of a black hole. Somethings there but you can't see it.

The other thing is (what I've been seeing pretty much my whole life) is that there is nothing in my vision after the age 40. I go from in depth visions of colors and bright numbers (age markers) to the age 40 being being small and after that is a dark grey field. I can see the field but there is nothing there to see.
I realize what the obvious interpretation is but that doesn't necessarily mean death of the body. Maybe it does but it may also mean the death of something else. As in the death card in the Tarot. Just the death of something. Change. I know it means change. Significant change. I have supporting visions and feelings that indicate that it will occur shortly after my birthday in coming months.
I was just hoping that perhaps someone else could sense anything. I've had many visions about people I have met on boards before. Maybe it will work the other way this time. =)

Just thought I'd ask. No harm in that.

Hey Nakis! I sure have missed you on the board!

I'm going out on a limb here, because I think I understand what you are talking about, because I've had similar experiences. I don't know if anything will apply to your particular situation, but I can tell you a little of mine.

I've had "glimpses" of my life for years. For example, I knew I would not marry until I was almost 30, I knew I would quit teaching, I knew I would not have a biological child (that was a biggie, I had been seeing that one since my early teens; a lot of odd visions I didn't understand at the time, but each one was correct). These were not necessarily things I "wanted" to happen, these were just things I could "see" happening in my life. About three years or so ago, I quit having my "glimpses", and I got pretty worried about it.

I don't know if in my case, I had so much stress that I quit being able to see these things, or what the problem was. I think for me, it did mark a significant change. In my case, it was the death of my parents, whom I was very close to.

I've only recently began having my glimpses again, but I have noticed they are in shorter increments(sp) of time than when I was younger. For example, I've been able to clearly see Brianna's first day of school and some other milestones in her life.

In your situation, I would say that you are on target about a significant change. It could be someone entering or exiting your life. It could signifiy a change in careers, or a change in your health. It could simply be your subconscious mind telling you that you have some apprehensions about turning 40. That is a big milestone for those of us, ahem, in our late thirties.

I would give it some time. You may just be in a stressful period right now and not seeing your visions as clearly as before. Just "roll with the punches" and take a wait and see attitude and remember to take care of yourself. In most cases, if it is a significant change, there isn't going to be a lot you can do to change the course. Perhaps you feel like something is blocking your vision? Some sort of roadblock in your life, or hurdle you need to overcome? I may be completely off target, but that would be my gut instinct.

I don't know if I've helped any or not, but I do think I understand what you are talking about. Good to see you back, Nakis!

[ January 17, 2005, 07:31 AM: Message edited by: Carrie ]

Hi Nakis,

I too have had periods of knowing or sensing what will come to be and stretches with nothing. A few thoughts if I may:

I agree with Carrie that your likely on target in that the gray area may represent a significant change during that time period. It may be something you will need to make a difficult decision on. That decision may not be clearly defined because it can go two different yet equaly possible ways, so the vision is being blocked for now? Some people have experienced a sudden onset of these types of visions, while others the reverse happens as Carrie noted, where prior visions are suddenly quieted or stopped all together.

I feel it's possible that visions that relate to oneself may very well come from within oneself. If we charted our path and journey for this lifetime it would make sense that we may get glimpses of it. We may well chart if we want to recieve these glimpses or not and for how long and how detailed.

I also agree that stress can cause many things and that may be playing a part in your visions being cloudy. I too would give it time, they very well may return. I ditto Carrie it's nice to see you back on the board Nakis. =)

Nakis,
You are not alone, I also have visions. starting when I was really young. I'm not sure how old but when I was little I would have glimpse of not acual events but, glimpses of what life would be like.. example: I would have these glimpse I guess you would call them of what life was like without my father. It seem though my childhood I knew that my dad would not be around. When I was 15 my father passed away. It scared the crap out of me because I felt like if I thought it, it would happen.. I still have a hard time with this. you know sometimes you just have weird thoughts, and I never know really If I'm having a glimpse of my life or something trigered a weird thought into my head.. Funny that this was posted because Latley I have been having glimpes, without my husband.. I hate these glimpse, Sometime I think it would be better not to have them. I can't figure out if I'm just doing it because it's a fear, or if it's real.. After my father died it took the longest time to realise it wasn't my fault. I'm not getting into religion but I believe that it's God's way of preparing me for something.. Of course being the selfish person I am, I don't want to have to prepare for it.. I beat myself up a lot over these visions, I think it's because of when I was young I was scard that if I thought about it, it would happen. I don't know I have problems dealing with it. But I know that you and I are not alone on this kind of thing..

Hi Nakis - good to see you. =)

Lots of good replies here. I just wanted to let you know that I'm mulling this over and feel as if I'm zeroing in on what it may be. I will be getting back with you shortly. (It may be via a PM though.)

Hugs,
Kell

[ January 18, 2005, 02:40 PM: Message edited by: KellKell ]

NAKIS! So good to see you!!! We miss you on the board.

This is perfect timing for this thread Nakis because in all honesty I have been pondering the same thing as of late. I too have always had a general idea of what my future held. Nothing too specific...just a very general idea, a glimpse here and there really. Recently though, I can't seem to catch a glimpse of anything. It's really made me nervous too Nakis. I've been wondering why or what is different all of a sudden. I don't really have anything to add to what's already been said, other then to say that I agree with what Carrie and Cat have said. It just makes a lot of sense if you really think about it. I also wanted to let you know that this has also happened to me. You're not alone with this one!

Thanks for the responses.

Don't worry Shana, I know I am not alone in this. That's why I posted to the board. I know so many people share this awareness and that many on the board have this ability. Thank you for your concern.

And thanks for all the 'We missed you's'. It's very sweet and moving. I've been spending some of the free time I had to spend in this board at another board about current events and my ire towards certain political individuals and social inequalities. It's hard to share without some of that spilling over and I don't want to put that stuff on this board. This board is too special to get stirred up over that.

Thank you very much about your responses to my post. I knew you guys would understand.
I know it's not anxiety over turning 40. I stopped counting my age when I turned legal for drinking. Age became irrelavent. I already had my first colonoscopy (the initiation to middle age) =) HEHEHE OHHHH!!! ;0 I really don't get the feeling that it has to do with age.

I do sense things to be but this is a vision that lays out my life. It's not once in a while it's something I have seen constantly since I was very young. Certain parts unfold over time but the layout is the same.
Carrie, I can see past 40. It's not like it is foggy. It's very clear. It's just a flat dark gray board. There is nothing there. Empty. Void. I can see the numbers of future years (age) but they are without light or luster and lay flat on the plane.
Actually my visions and knowings have increased. Actually when I was a child they happened alot. I often was staring out in space in appearance when I was actually seeing stuff. It tapered off in my teenage years but now I am seeing more and more things again. But it never really turned off.

Thanks you guys have helped me with seeing some other possibilities. I know I can get myoptic in seeing some of these visions and not see the other possibilities.

Please let me know if you zero in on anything Kell. I would appreciate any 'site' insight.

Hi Nakis and everyone!
Surprise! I am still here also ).
I am yet another one who is having trouble seeing past a certain age, mine is 52? I have had this number since I was a child, although 52 is eons away at 20! LOL I am now 46.5, had to get that .5 in there.
When I was a child I also had visions, Mom called them dejavu, and pretty much knew my lifes course. They didn't become less intense as I have aged but seem to be more fragmented. But all of my life the year 52 is a zero and after. In my twenties I assumed I would die, but I am not so certain about that anymore.
What it seems like to me is the more choices we make change our life path, of course! I beleive we have choices and I also beleive I will have many more up to age 52 that will again alter my path. Its my choice. I am talking about life altering choices, etc. Beleive it or not my path seemed clearer as a child or young person! LOL
Not that I haven't made life altering choices in my life but I sense I will be up against something, good or bad in several years. And it is scarey being able to see things in your life, all of your life and then having that void there.
So I feel forewarned that I have some important decisions in the years to come.
Also, I do see other things. I have seen my Grandaughters wedding, Gabby. Gabby is 11 this month and unless she is going to be a child bride (lets hope not and hope Grandma is right ) I can see past 52 concerning other people? I don't see alot past 52 concerning others because again my choices will most likely affect anothers life.
I hope that I am making sense! LOL Been working long hard hours, its 4am, my mind has been scrambled a bit lately! LOL
Remember when we tried to meet at the Golden Gate Bridge? LOL Been a couple years but I remember the salty taste in my mouth and some guy sitting there with me eating a sandwhich! A sandwich of all things? I never knew if that was you or not!
I feel that you don't have to worry, well only that some important choices are coming your way. And its not clear if they are good or bad. I look at it this way, maybe I will hit the Lotto or something that radical! LOL
Boy am I fragmenting this one! (post) I feel like I have now embarked on a series of decisions, my first was fighting my illness and returning to work. I decided I wanted a life, but I almost chose to stay on disability. Of course choices like this affect our path, especially other lives coming into ours.
Ok good, hope I made some sense of my feeling I get. If I have totally confused you, your not alone! LOL Lately I have been at a loss for words, yeah me? Can't tell you why, words came so easy to me all of my life and now? I don't think its dementia?
Nice to see you Nakis and of course everyone!
Maybe I can find somewhere to post another tidbit )!
Miss you all,
Piggerita

It's nice to hear from you again Peg.

I get everything you said except the part about the Golden Gate bridge.???

What you says makes a lot of sense. I'm not really worried. I don't feel a sense of fear either. =)

Funny thing happened to me yesterday. I had just finished off a glass of soda. It was in one of those large white plastic soda cups you get from fast food places. In the bottom of the cup, in the remainder of the soda was two number. 4 and 0. They were backwards. From the bottom it read forwards. It was quite unmistakeable. The last remaining bits of soda formed two numbers
I realize when something is on your mind, the mind tends to see it more. Like as soon as you buy a car you notice all the other cars on the road like yours. Or when something is bothering you all the related things to that issue become more pronounced.
But this was quite unmistakeable. It was a complete backwards 4 and just shy of a complete zero. How odd that like tea leaves I would get that particular number in the bottom of a soda cup. It could have been another number freakily appearing there but no, the number 40.
Very strange. Very strange indeed. It freaked me a little bit. Knowing something is going to change psychicly is one thing. Seeing a physical manifestation is a little bit different.